Are you quite finished yet? Other people need to use the suicide-booth too you know.

Smile, and the world, asks you what the fuck you’re doing.

Bite my enormous golden ass.

“Attention Exam takers, we are now cruising at the High altitude of ‘Woah, dude’. Refreshment joints will be served at the intermission, between English Adv, and Art. This has been your captain speaking, please enjoy the rest of the flight. And good luck passing the exam.”

Everyone’s favorite bridge night-watchman, “Please line up in an orderly fashion. There’s plenty of time for everyone to have their turn. For those who’ve changed their minds, please exit via the beginning and end of the bridge. All others please make your way to the exits on your left, or right, and we’ll see you on the other side.”

If you didn’t want to be lied to, you shouldn’t have asked me a question.

Satan, the churches best sales pitch since Eden.

“I like your eyes. Can I touch them?”

“What do you mean your out of corpses?!”
Mortician, “Well ever since that zombie crisis, they’ve just been walking out the door.”

If you see anything interesting or unusual; enjoy it while you can.

Of course I heard what you said; I just don’t care.

You’ll have to speak up, I’m wearing a towel.

How would you like to be a Unik?

Do you mind if I turn this down? I can’t hear my brain melting.

“There’s a purple monkey glowing in the Dark room? Well what did you expect?”

Sex, drugs and rock’n’roll, just don’t forget the alchy-hol.

“How would you like it if I ate your face? No, exactly, I didn’t think so. Then would you kindly regurgitate mine. Thank you.”

How many alarms, reminders and urgent phone calls does it take to get Joel to show up on time?
We don’t know… It still hasn’t happened yet…








Exams have ruined my mind.
There's no other explination.
I feel so stupid, I keep feeling so shit, like everything in my life is BS. But things are pretty good. I just wish I could get over this without doing anything stupid.
Thak you Joel for being there for me, even when I'm being such a retard.